The Blogger's Dilemma

Hi all! Here's a quick blog going over what's been happening in my life. I've been so bad keeping up with this (what's new right?). I have the hardest time keeping up with this thing. Plus, I've been going through so much. I've been traveling like crazy, mercury went into retrograde (...yeesh) that makes me question everything in life, I should never blog during that time it would be filled with me ranting about what should I do with my life, and I'm supposed to be a responsible adult & I just can't do it. I don't think that would be a big hit. Another reason for such a long pause is I'm really trying to perfect the subject of my blog. I want to be a serious blogger. I want to really pinpoint a subject and focus on it.

But I can't. I love too much not to share.

So here's the deal. I really want to write about beauty products but, one issue-I work for many different lines so I don't want to piss anyone off. Second-I don't have enough money to buy all this stuff!! I look at some bloggers and I'm like, "Holy crap! That person just spent $300 at Sephora!" Just no. I can't. I don't do that & I'm a makeup artist! I spend my money on food & clothes. So, I will review products, but it's going to take some time folks. Because if I'm trying it out for a blog, I'm using every last drop until I move on to the next item. So hold tight people. There will be beauty reviews, tips & pointers. But it's going to take some time for me to get through certain items.

Another issue-I am not made of money folks. I know. Sad story. With that being said, I have started to research how to better my blog, sharpen my skills. And yes, some of these skills cost nothing. But-some do. And once again, I spend my money on food & clothing. I just can't throw some cash at a fancy website or blog page. I won't have the fancy photo shoots and my pictures won't look fantastic on a regular basis. I do have a couple things up my sleeve though. So better quality pictures will be here, but not all the time so don't get used to it alright? Selfie sticks and blogspot are here to stay, sorry guys.

Sorry, but it's true! I can't afford a photographer all the time so I'll do the best that I can. What I can offer is this-honesty. I've been boggling my mind on what subject to focus on. Do I focus on fitness? Health? Beauty? Food? Inspirational follow your dreams posts? I don't know!

I did some research and started checking out many other blogs and I realized something. I feel more defeated and down after checking out a lot of blogs rather than feelings super pumped about eating clean, new beauty & fashion trends, or working out. I feel like these people are freakin awesome and perfect and I'll never get to that point. I beat myself up because I'm not investing all this money into new makeup and Skincare constantly to amp up my blog posts. I feel bad and discouraged when I want an outfit from someone and then read to see where it's from and it's $600! I realized this is magical and it's wonderful and there are so many people that will spend that money and get these things but I can't. So I've decided to basically write for myself. I'm not going to suggest things that I wouldn't buy myself, I'm not going to show clothing I can't afford, I'm not going to make it look like I spend hours at the gym or make green juices every day. I'm going to be me and hopefully build a group of strong badass women like me to follow this blog and feel good & empowered after reading.

Now I'm not saying that others bloggers make people feel bad. No. I am just saying I have yet to find a blogger that I fit with. I'm going to share life with you. Sharing the Struggles of doing what you love, but also the rewards. Trying affordable, natural products that I love. Sharing with you the inspirations that cross my path & the fears. Basically this is my online diary and I'm ready to inspire and share. And I hope you like it!


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Angels in the workplace

Hi folks! Summer is officially here in Nashville. Wow, it's hot and sunny & beautiful! Im sure my husband who works outside begs to differ. But, summer is here whether you like it or not.

For me, I love summer. I always look back fondly at summer and miss it so much. But during the summer I feel like I dread it. I dread wearing a swimsuit, showing more skin, I beat myself up over not preparing my body during the winter for my "summer body." I feel like I don't take advantage of all the amazing things that are happening during the summer because I'm so hard on myself and beat myself up over aspect of summer and honestly it sucks. I'm so tired of beating myself up over not being prepared for my summer body, then beating myself up for not appreciating the moment and enjoying the summer. Y'all, this has to stop! And I am making a conscious effort to not do this anymore!

In my previous post I wrote about the new direction I'm going with the blog. Yes, of course I'll write about beauty & products I love. Yes, I'll write about fun, natural health tips and products that I'm trying. This is me, this will not go away. But I also want to really start being real with y'all. The perception of what social media gives is this-all day I sit in my house and make Skincare & green juices and me and my talented husband just build amazing pieces of furniture all day. We have a beautiful garden that we maintain and eat all organic healthy foods. But unfortunately that's not the case. And I want to be honest about that. The truth is I am an aesthetician for a few high-end Skincare lines & a makeup artist who never truly knows what her work schedule will be like. To stay busy and be successful in this beauty world you have to keep your schedule free. But keeping your schedule free means not having a crutch of a job to lean on for security. So when you're working, buckle up, hold on & good luck! It's crazy and it's fun & it all usually happens back-to-back. But when you get free time or "days off" you don't get paid. So those times are rarely spent relaxing. Those "days off" usually consist of me doing the budget for the next month in a panic and sweating profusely.

But, in the end, my workload is always busier than I ever expect it to be and it always works out. That's just the beauty of the job. You never know what you're going to get and that's ok. That's life. When I made a regular paycheck and worked regular hours I felt like a robot. Even though I was working in the beauty industry still doing what I was interested in, it wasn't what I loved. The second I quit that job I started really living. I started really feeling things. Some of those things were stress, uncertainty, worry, anxiety, and a couple of arguments with Corey sprouted from money (damn you money). But, the main feelings I felt were excitement, motivation, determination, happiness, freedom, contentment & love. The ladder definitely outweighs the couple of moments of stress for sure. My life is not a roller coaster of emotions. The fear and more negative feelings come and go very rarely. But I just wanted to put it out there that this life I live is not easy as it may seem when you look at my social media or see others' blogs. I just want to be real.

Really, it isn't easy. It isn't easy to blog. It isn't easy to blog because I feel like I'm writing to nobody or I feel like I'm ridiculous because I'm not expert, do I really think people want to hear what I have to say? I don't know...really, I have no clue. But the truth is, I love putting my feelings out there and writing is my best outlet. So even if people don't read this, that's ok. It's my therapy.

One of the best things that has come from taking this journey that I have chosen is the people I have met along the way. Being a freelance makeup artist is amazing. You get to travel and meet people, tons of people. I have people I can call friends all over this region and that makes me so lucky. This group of girls are amazing! Truly, amazing. They took the same risk I took and we share the same passion and love and they are so uplifting and encouraging and that means so much to me. There are moments of doubt and it can be really hard doing this job sometimes. You have to leave home, once again, the instability of the job is hard enough, it's long days and crazy schedules-but then you have these golden moments of talking to these powerful women who are in the same position as you and reaffirming themselves and others that this is the job we are meant for. Wow, it always comes at the right time & it always stays with me. I also get to meet so many people who sit in the makeup chair or lay on the facial bed and I get to talk to them, and make them feel good. But lately I feel like they're giving me more to take away than I'm giving them. Lately I've had customers send me words of encouragement and positivity that I truly needed. It's amazing what those words can do for someone who works in this field.

This job has led me to some of the best people I have ever met. These people are good people. They have amazing hearts & that same free spirit I have that I cherish in others. They encourage me, they listen to my worries, and they lift me up even if they don't realize it. We get together and share our fears, worries, and dreams and we encourage one another that we're not crazy and just keep on going! It's important to find that support group. The ones that get what you do, support what you do, inspire you, and encourage you. Be that person for someone else. Find friends in your field and be there for one another. I'm so lucky I have found mine.


This is one of the subjects that I will focus on in my blog. This won't just be a facade of my life is perfect and I just travel freely and do makeup & have fun. It'll show the struggle and doubts that we all have. But the main truth is, do what you love. When you do that all things fall into place and everything works out every time. You get to meet amazing people who share those same interests and they will lift you up and change your life.

Posted using BlogPress from my iPad