I know that this saying has been used somewhere before...can't put my finger on it though. I'm just kidding! I know this is Nike, but it's the saying that kept looping through my brain last night.
I got home after some work and me and Corey have really been into finding things to watch that either-a) spark our creativity, b) inspire us to follow our goals and dreams, c) help us pinpoint our goals and dreams, d) make us laugh. So, we watched Chef's Table on Netflix. The first episode is about chef Massimo Bottura and his story from a rocky beginning to now being the owner of a three-Michelin-star restaurant.
When I first started watching it, it shows modern time. He owns the kitchen and you can see his confidence shine through. I watch him, and all I think is, "wow, I want to have that kind of confidence in my passion. I want to own a room and just have my passion flow through me." You see him as just this powerful, confident, strong, chef that has it all figured out. But then they go through his journey and it's one of those realizations of, "HEEELLLLOOOO!!!!! He worked his ass off for this & it did NOT come easy!" Just like most powerfully inspiring stories, his had the early naive years, the tough times, the weak times, the times you wanted to quit, the numerous times you get rejected, and then when you think it's all lost...POOF! Curve ball! And viola! You've made it!
I had no idea while watching the beginning of this documentary that this man had pissed off his entire town he lived in because of his "crazy" ways of creating Italian dishes. You would never know this man was mocked for his style & literally made the front pages of magazines and newspapers ripping apart his food. You just don't see that, but it happened. It made me realize that even these people that "have it all" still had to work for it. And something that rewarding will come with tough times and a lot of hard work.
What I like about his is this-he's not some reality star who just randomly became famous for being who they are. He went through the ringer and succeeded and that's what's different from him and these "other celebrities." You can see that with him. You are immediately in awe of his presence, you can tell this man knows & loves what he's doing. He is meant to be a chef and it's really exciting to witness this act of fate.
While watching this, I'm continually inspired. It helps me whittle down exactly what I want to do & who I want to be. It truly shows me, I love the beauty world & it oddly gave me a boost of confidence. I'm watching this documentary and I'm listening to his story of his childhood memory of the kitchen & cooking & how oddly serendipitous it is that he is a chef and it was like it was all laid in place for him. But it wasn't. Yes, these childhood memories make it seem like it was crystal clear, but he still had to work like a maniac to become successful. All these stories about him hiding under the kitchen table & talking about his grandma rolled pasta, it's beautiful & it just takes me back to all these funny signs I had growing up and how blatantly obvious it was that I should be in the beauty field, yet I had the hardest time trying to figure out what to do for a living. Hell, up until this year did I stop trying to run away from this field! Why couldn't I just accept my fate & my passion & go with it? I don't know. It's just not that easy when what you love & what you do for a living isn't a "normal" job.
But watching this documentary made me feel more concrete in my passion & my future. His childhood memories about food & cooking really reminded me of all my funny memories that connect me to what I do today. At 7 I had a face cleansing brush from The Body Shop and I used it to cleanse my face religiously! From a very young age, I reveled in the compliments of my porcelain doll skin, lol. I'm ridiculous! In junior high,looking through YM magazine and practicing makeup looks from the CoverGirl ads were my refuge from not being the prettiest & not feeling pretty or "popular" in any way. In high school, I would book makeup appointments for my friends for our proms, I know, I said it already-I'm ridiculous! In college I remember "shaping" a boyfriend's brows all the time. I mean geez! It's like this profession was right in front of me! Yet I still questioned it all the time! Sometimes I still do.
But this documentary made me realize it's scary to follow your passion. I'm not the only person who questions their path or their purpose. I'm not the only one who struggles with stability or money & just has to take that leap of faith that it's all going to work out (which here's a little secret-if you follow your passion-it always works out!). I'm not the only one who's family and friends don't get their job or understand what they're doing or going to do. I'm not the only one who has sacrificed a lot to get to where they're going. Massimo Bottura didn't breeze through life either. The man worked for his success and it's so inspiring to watch.
With all that being said, while I'm watching this documentary I keep thinking about what I want, what my goals are, and what I need to do to get there. I love traveling with brands and representing these amazing lines. I love getting to meet all these amazing customers from all over & getting to hear their stories and getting to make them feel good & pretty & important. I love building relationships with the people that work at all these events that I get to see regularly. I love helping & teaching people about what their skin needs an how to apply makeup. I love helping people find the right regimen for their skin & helping them love their skin! I also really, really love sharing my Skincare, makeup & product knowledge with people that want to learn-hence the blog. Forever I have told myself, "I need to find a local magazine, online or paper, and write for them." I know so much about beauty & I want to share that. But for some reason I felt like I needed to work for somebody else. I needed to work for some other magazine, newspaper, or blogger. But last night while watching that documentary I heard, "just do it" over & over in my mind and I'm like, "ok!" Lol, it was really that simple all of a sudden.
I realized I have a blog! I don't need somebody else to tell me what to write for them. I don't need somebody else to tell me I'm relevant enough to write for them. I am relevant enough & I will share it my damn self! I know it seems silly since I already do have a blog. But I've held back so much because I didn't feel like a "real" blogger for some reason. I don't know what kind of recognition I needed or who's approval I was waiting for. But last night it dawned on me. I'm so hard on myself & I'm rarely happy with what I do or the outcome of a lot of my work. But one thing I know I am good at & what I'm meant to do on this earth is to share my love, passion, knowledge & excitement about skin & beauty. So what's holding me back???? Myself. And that's not going to happen anymore. I'm not going to wait for this big blog to want me, or that big magazine or newspaper to consider me. I'm just going to do it myself. I can't keep talking myself out of it. I want to share things but sometimes I worry that I look like I'm trying to be something else, or I'm trying to act cool or like I'm some beauty know-it-all. I talk myself out of so much because of my own doubts & critiques. So, I'm going to have to remind myself that this is what I want, this is what I'm good at, and this is what I'm meant to do.
Hang tight folks, I'm ready to share so much!!! Just do it!
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